Lopsided Fate
by MarsMagnus
Summary: Something about Harry is not like the wizarding world expected. Still, they are quite smitten with their knight in faux-shining armour.


I don't own Harry Potter. Harry Potter is the property of J.K. Rowling, and is not my intellectual property. There is no financial gain made from this nor will any be sought. This is for entertainment purposes only.

Chapter 1 - Meeting HAGGER

Harry swiped the sweat from his forehead, as he was working on old vehicle parts his uncle Vernon had him clean for the local was boiling outside and he only got some dry sandwiches of last week for lunch. "Are you done with the acidic parts yet, boy?!", Aunt Petunia shrieked a few inches from Harry's ear. His eardrum ruptured a little. He brushed his greasy hand on his clown-like trousers and stood, facing his aunt. Blackeyed and bruised, he threw her a sad grin. Because he had sustained spinal injuries a few years back, the grin was lopsided as always. He limped a few feet aways from his Aunt, to get aways from her frail, claw like hands. "Come here, now!" Harry had no option but to limp back. He had to follow her into the house, where there was a particularly dirty toilet for him to scrub. Dudley laughed nastily, when Harry had to use the toilet brush and couldn't hold himself up straightly. Harry fell face first into the toilet, and he nearly drowned in the dirty cess-pool that lay at the bottom of the toilet. He took a few gulps, because he hadn't had any water in days.

The doorbell rang. It was the chef of the local homeless shelter again. "Yes, of course we can wash all your dirty dishes again!", Petunia answered, throwing Harry a nasty felt spasms in his neck and back and clutched a handkerchief to wipe the sweat away. He watched his aunt wearily. Petunia was just carrying more dirty dishes into the house. "Here boy! Get your lazy ass to work already! We feed you, we clothe you, you'll have to repay a _little_ of that!" From the garden, the sound of a truck backing up could be heard. "Oh, they are delivering more old batteries and explosives for you to sort through and look for scrap metal." Harry looked for his mask to protect himself from the chemicals, but when he couldn't find it, he ran outside without it. Petunia was angry enough already. _I'm really lucky today_ , Harry thought. _Petunia doesn't realize I never even finished even a single of my chores! She just keeps finding new ways to put me to work!_ The only thing Harry had get done this day was delivering a whole grilled cow to Dudley in a wheelbarrow, who was now happily gnawing the last bits of meat off the bones. "Change the channel, dad!", he blared. Loud grunting noises came out of the living room, when Dudley heaved himself up to get the remote control himself, because his father didn't react (he was in the attic). Harry began to sort through the massive mountain of unexploded ammunition and old car parts that the semi-truck had unloaded into the backyard, careful to not immediately step unto something deadly. He was by now used to working in this environment, and he felt right at home between razor sharp edges of old steel and the looming danger of pulverization.

In the evening, Harry was just happy to still be in one piece, and a little proud that only two of his fingers had been dipped into highly concentrated battery acid this day. He wasn't afraid, because even severe burns like these were always healed in the morning. Because Harry Potter was no normal crippled boy. Harry Potter was special. And when he went to bed this night he never knew his life was about to change.

About a week later, the Dursleys were particulary angry at him, and decided to move to a little island after beating Harry up a few hours. Harry didn't really understand why, perhaps because of the strange letters that were arriving in those past days, but he couldn't read anyway. He was now tending to all of the Dursley's business ideas himself - letting Harry wash dishes, sort old car parts, even letting him prepare whole banquets for the local hotels. The Dursleys called him once a day (officially), Petunia called every five minutes for other chores. The strange letters, who had originally contained words that were impossible to decipher for Harry, were now full of little symbols of sticks, a castle, and a bearded man. _Huh._

When Harry went to bed very exhausted, he still slept in his cupboard under the stairs.

Harry was awoken by ear-splitting splintering of wood very close. _Probably the cat_ , Harry thought. He heard a few lumbering steps, and a man mumbling in a low voice. "Su muny durs in this huse. U rueal chure to do." Harry stood up in his bed, trying to look through the holes in his door despite knowing that Vernon had closed them earlier. Then again, splintering.

Suddenly, the door was thrown out of its hinges, falling onto Harry. It covered just the sagging part of his face. _A big bearded man, he looks just like Santa!_ A big grin formed on Harry's face. The man grumbled heartily. "Hey, little bloke. Your smile is just like your mother's, very symmetrical.", he told Harry and with just one swish of his hand, the door moved up.

With the door out of the way, and Harry now in plain sight, Hagrid's smile fell, although not as much as Harry's. "Huh. You're a bit more retarded than I anticipated. Don't worry though fella. You'll be right at home at Hogwarts with that." - "Well, I always try not to be lopsided, it just doesn't always work out.", Harry defended himself weakly. "I can also smirk, if you like that better than grinning?" - "Uh, dun worry, i''ll be allrigh', yeah?", Hagrid admitted and waved it aside. "Do you want a sausage?", he then asked and went to the living room. He set the rug on fire. _Finally the Dursleys will be right. I DID set the house on fire this time_ , Harry thought happily. He sat next to the man, and took a sausage from his hands. "Now Harry, I dun't even know why we are still here, but you'll probably want to knuw everythung aboot Hogwarts, eh?" Harry thought for a moment, his forehead scrunched up in deep thought. "Wait.. I'm not supposed to talk to strangers! Who are you even?" - "My name is Rubeus Hagrid, I am the gamekeeper at Hogwarts" - "Hag-" - "Hagrid", he replied evenly. The boy obviously had problems pronouncing his name."Hagger?" he asked uncertainly. Hagrid smiled uncomfortably and nodded. "That will do it for nuw. So, abu' Hogwarts you knuw everything, I s'puse."

Harry nodded. Then he realized he didn't knew anything at all, and he shook his head. Hagrid sighed deeply enough to shake the window panes. "This is gunna be hurd, I s'puse."

Snatching one of the colorful letters off the floor, Hagrid's face took on a puzzled expression. "This is simple enough for any four-year-old to understand.", Hagrid thought to himself. He was growing concerned about young Harry's mental development. Harry snatched the letter from Hagrid's hand. "This is _my_ letter!" he exclaimed. "Yus, it is. Open it." With this, Hagrid took his pink umbrella in a sneaky way. Harry struggled opening the letter.

At Hagrid's magic touch, the letter opened and Harry cheered loudly at his impressive feat. Then, the letter began talking in a very raspy voice even more Scottish than Hagrid.

"Dear Mr. Potter,

You can go to Hogwarts! Please refer to your wizard guardian for more information.

Kind regards,

Dumbledore."

"This must be the simplified version we normally use for foreign students.", Hagrid thought. "What have they dun to poor Harry here? His mind is like a pekinese's, mind ya."

Harry stood up, jumped up and down and clapped his hands. "Hogwarts, Hogwarts, I am going to Hogwarts!" Then he froze. "What is Hogwarts, Hagger?" "Hogwarts is a very special place, a place for people like you." Harry got even happier "Is everyone there lopsided and re-re-retarded?" Hagrid frowned. "No, Harry. It is a place for wizards!" "Oh.." "You're a wizard, Harry." Hagrid had looked forward to Harry's reaction to that particular fact since being assigned the job of fetching him, but the reaction Harry gave him threw him off. He just gazed into space, a bit of drool forming on the lopsided part of his otherwise impeccable emerald green orbs were clear of any emotion. "Uh… Harry?", Hagrid asked him, again uncomfortable. "What? Oh…", Harry said and turned around. "I have to go to the loo." Hagrid sat down and broke the couch.

Meanwhile, the fire had spread around the room, and the whole house was slowly catching fire. As Harry closed the bathroom door, Hagrid began to feel fuzzy. He just wasn't comfortable around closed doors. Thus, he decided to kick that one in as well. The door came crashing onto Harry sitting on the loo. "Don't worry, I'm used to wood splinters.", Harry said with a lopsided grin. "We ought to do something about that grin… and this one…" The emerald eyed boy looked at his shoulder, seeing the armlong splinter sticking out, torn muscle fiber clinging to it. "Uh….", Harry only stated a fact. He tried pulling the splinter out, of course twisting his back while doing that. "I can't get a grip on that, Hagger. I can't move my back!" Harry got scared because nothing really, certainly not because of the giant splinter in his back. For a split second, all his nerves were wired correctly and he had full control of his face, revealing a big, evenly-sided grin. "I'm coming for ya, Harry!", Hagrid screamed while lurching towards the boy. He bumped into the jet-black-haired eleven-year-old and both fell onto the ground with Hagrid on top. "My back… it is alright now.", Harry said calmly. Hagrid stood up with loud grunting and helped the boy up. Luckily, the 500 pound man had pushed the splinter clearly through Harry's body. "So, Harry, you ready to go to Hogwarts, now that I have told you everything important to know about it?" Harry thought for a moment about whether he really did know everything there was to know. "Yes, Hagger", he replied. Hagrid smiled congenially and gave Harry his robe. "Here, you can sleep under it and you also can keep it, so we don't have to go to Madam Malkins." Then, Hagrid sniffed. "It is a bit smoky here, innit?", he asked. The house was ablaze.

Hagrid began to shoulder his way through the already burning walls, and Harry was quick to follow. As quick as a limp, at least.

The engine of Hagrid's flying motorcycle roared through the night. The remains of Privet Drive No 4 fell to little pieces in a blinding explosion of battery acid, unspent ammunition and atomic fire ball rebounded and Hagrid and Harry got really fast. "Wohooo, I am flying!", Harry exclaimed, although he did this for the last five minutes already. "Like magic…" Hagrid had to stop himself to not roll his eyes, and he only managed not to because he knew no one could tell the difference either way, as his black beetle eyes wouldn't show it, and he flew in the direction of London. At least he thought it was this way.


End file.
